Beautiful Singer

Me: “Sorry, I couldn’t get a ticket for your evening concert. They were all sold out.”
Gus: “Aww, but now you won’t get to hear my beautiful singing voice!”

More wine, mum?

Me , “Gus, how come your car seat is in the house?
Gus, “We took a taxi home”
Me, “Ah, did mum have a glass of wine?”
Gus leans in and says with a smirk, “More like 5 glasses.”

Weekdays

Me: “Feels like a Sunday today.” Gus: “It is Sunday.” Me: “No, it’s Monday”. Gus: “Oh, well it feels like a Wednesday to me”.”

Roofy

Walking home from school we pass a guy on a ladder with a hose cleaning his roof. Gus shouts at him with a little bit of snarky sarcasm in his voice: “Hey! Good luck cleaning your roof!””

Legoless

“Playing The Lego Lord of the Rings video game, Gus says, “why is his name Legolas? Is it because he doesn’t have any Lego?””

Santa Calling

I was on the phone talking to Gus pretending to be Santa (Claus). As he was telling me his list he pauses and says to Santa, “You gettin’ this down?”

The C Word.

Gus: “Hey Dad, I know what the “C” word is, do you know?” Me: “Um, I think so. What do you think it is?” Gus: “Crap”. Me: Whew.

The Dangerous Kitchen

Gus: “That haunted frying pan better not be on the porch when I get home or I’ll be super mad!”

I Don’t want to go to Disneyland.

Gus asked when we could go to Disneyland. I suggested that maybe he could go without me. I told him that I’m too old for that place. He says to me; “Well you could just stand around. Or sit. You’re good at that. Maybe have a couple of drinks, a bite to eat…”

Lazer Blades

So I says to Gus, “But what if I had razor blades in my pocket?” Gus says back,”You don’t have lazer blades in your pocket!”